Overwhelmed? Smell the Roses and Blow Out the Candles
by Ellen DuBois on 11/26/14
I'm feeling overwhelmed. It's the day before Thanksgiving. As the cold rain pours down - I listen to the patter.
My mother's been in and out of the hospital since September 26th. My father and I brought her home yesterday. Thank God she'll be home for Thanksgiving. It's not easy seeing your parents ill. Not at all. It's not easy seeing them age or feeling older myself.
However, it's better than the alternative.
My dog passed away on Veteran's Day. God, I miss him. I have a new, little buddy to love, but one pet does not replace another. I can love my new dog and still grieve Baron. I had him for fifteen-plus years.
I feel empty, but I know I'll bounce back. I'll count my blessings and be okay. It's just that right now, I'm not.
There's other "stuff", too, but I don't want this to sound like a complete gripe session. Maybe it is. Maybe I need to vent. I've always written my way out of dark places. It's a release. I need to let out and sort out my feelings, and writing seems to be my ticket to sanity.
This is also what would have been my due date so many years ago, had I not miscarried. I get overwhelmed this time of year even without all the other things going on.
So, while I try to wrap my brain around my mother's health, (and worrying about my father), grieve the loss of my baby some twenty years ago and my dog not even two weeks ago, wait on the radiologist's second opinion of my mammogram to see if I need another biopsy and, to hell with my fibroids, (they can wait), I will breathe.
Like they've said so many times to my mother, "Smell the roses and blow out the candles."
I'm doing it now. If you're feeling overwhelmed, you might want to try it. It helps.
Ellen DuBois: I'm the author of I Never Held You: Miscarriage, Grief, Healing and Recovery and Host of MiscarriageHelp.com. I've also been published with Blue Mountain Arts, and am a contributing author to several books including: Soul Matters for Teens, Sisters, (Blue Mountain Arts gift book), Conquering Panic and Anxiety Disorders- Success Stories, Strategies and other Good News, Romancing the Soul, More God Allows U-Turns. Additionally, I'm also known as "Miss Ellen"- a piano teacher to students from 5 to tween and beyond-
I love it!